Youth Voices

Window for Solitude

By Amna Javed

Image by Amna, Source: Internet

“Inside myself is a place where I live alone, and that is where I renew my springs that never dry up” – Pearl Buck.

This world is full of people. People of all sorts and kinds. They all are around us, everywhere. And mostly we find someone to talk to, to laugh with, to share, to live for… to die with.

And then there is isolation and solitude. Always so full of guarantee, so full of promise. It is there unwanted, unasked for. It is true that the more people surround you, believe in you, love you, hate you; the more isolated you become.

And then there is me… and my solitude!

*  *  *  *  *  *

Windows come in all shapes and sizes. For many a window is something where bright sunlight filters in. For others, it is a thing through which they see the shades of life. There are people who use their windows to look at the world that is passing by.  For some, a window represents an escape route and then there are people who see the window as a companion in loneliness and in defeat.

*  *  *  *  *  *

More days of isolation mark my life. More seconds pass by in which I grow, knowing the reality, yearning to be understood. I stare outside my window… my companion and my escape route. It is from this window, I see a world go by. A world growing and ageing. A world dark and murky, yet so full of colors. A world misunderstood. A world longing for peace. So full of catastrophe waiting for a cure.

And passing cars with flashing headlights. Going somewhere, going nowhere. Making the sound of waves in an empty ocean.

It is from that very window that I see a world: a world full of people whose names I do not know, but through their faces their stories are told.

*  *  *  *  *  *

I can see all this through my window. On the most tiresome days when my eyes are sore and my body weak. My heart, broken. Soul, longing.  When my isolation turns into solitude. I have stood there at my window.

And as I do so, I am in a realm of my imagination… still alive.